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Toilet stall humour!

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Q: What's the difference between period blood and sand?

A: You can't gargle sand.

 

Q: What's the difference between a train carriage and a miscarriage?

A: You can't eat a train carriage.

 

and then i saw another one:

 

Q: Is it still pedofillia if the kid is dead?

A: If it is, Dumbledore is f**ked!

 

then i turned to my left and saw, "Please enjoy your shit!"

 

i love public toilets.

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In Humanities and Social Sciences Building 2nd Floor Mens... Just above the toilet paper dispenser

 

"Pull Here For Arts Degree"

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Q: What's the difference between a train carriage and a miscarriage?

A: You can't eat a miscarriage.

 

you cocked that one up, by saying 'you can't eat a miscarriage', you are implying that you can eat a train carriage...

 

should read, 'you can't eat a train carriage' or 'you can eat a miscarriage'

 

:lol:

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^^ you can eat a train carriage????

 

saw this

"did you come here to take a shit? you can have mine, i came here to leave one"

 

n "boycott toilet idealism!"

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"if einstein is so smart, why is he dead?!?!"

HAHA

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In Humanities and Social Sciences Building 2nd Floor Mens... Just above the toilet paper dispenser

 

"Pull Here For Arts Degree"

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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In Humanities and Social Sciences Building 2nd Floor Mens... Just above the toilet paper dispenser

 

"Pull Here For Arts Degree"

HAHAHAHAHAHA! f**kING GOLD!!!

 

Q: What's the difference between a train carriage and a miscarriage?

A: You can't eat a miscarriage.

 

you cocked that one up, by saying 'you can't eat a miscarriage', you are implying that you can eat a train carriage...

 

should read, 'you can't eat a train carriage' or 'you can eat a miscarriage'

 

:lol:

ahhhhh shit :( thanks for that, it's been changed :D

 

^^ you can eat a train carriage????

 

saw this

"did you come here to take a shit? you can have mine, i came here to leave one"

 

n "boycott toilet idealism!"

lol! that's pretty good!

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TURD BURGLAR

Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

 

CAMO-COUGH

Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

 

WATERMELON

Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

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"Pull Here For Arts Degree"

I think that was actually found written on cave walls by prehistoric man (it's pretty damn old).

 

I LOVE reading toilet graffiti at uni, it makes my day.

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i waz ere

waz i ere

ere i waz

 

then below that;

 

^^ this guy is a f**kwit

 

lol

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you guys should see the toilets in construction sites. could sit there and read for hours.

 

old one but still funny

 

some come here to sit and think

some come here to shit and stink

i come here to scratch my balls

and read the bullshit on the walls.

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hahahaha, read a good one today that said:

 

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari?

 

I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

 

:lol:

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Please flush twice,

its a long way to the cafeteria.

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HAHAHAHA there all fkn funny!!..

 

toilet graf is the best, its better then reading the paper in there.

 

if you want to avoid a " WATER MELON ", simply put some toilet paper in the bowl before taking a dump. this makes it a softer landing/no splash.

 

" i had no toilet paper, so i whiped my ass on the door handle, enjoy. "

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How do you tell if somebody in the workplace has constipation ?

 

Look for teeth marks on the toilet door.

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a poem i once saw. never forgot it

 

"Some come here to think

some come here to ponder

but i come here to shit and stink

and fart like there is thunder!"

 

 

 

never forgotten that one, saw in KFC toilets on george street in sydney in 1999. never forgotten it

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There is some funny shit here :)

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at work in 1 of the toilets its got on the right wall:

toilet tennis look left

 

then on the left wall it says:

toilet tennis look right

 

BAHA took me a couple times to figure it out :lol::doh:

i waz ere

waz i ere

ere i waz

 

then below that;

 

^^ this guy is a f**kwit

 

lol

:lol:

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uni toilet walls are the best, the only one i can really remember form uni is,

"whats the difference between an oven and a baby?"

"the oven doesnt screm when i put my meat in it."

 

and under

 

"your a f**kwit!!!!!"

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I saw one a long time ago, and also contributed to other toilet stalls across sydney.

 

On the door right down the bottom written in small words so you have to bend over to get a good look at it, it reads;

 

"You are now shitting at a 45degree angle"

 

lol, cracked myself when i first saw that :lol:

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'Here i sit, broken hearted. Tried to shit, only farted.'

 

Can sing this to the ABBA song 'Mamma Mia'....

 

Here I sit broken hearted, tried to sh**, but only farted... my my, did I ever let one go... Mama mia... here I go again...

Edited by AndrewR

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At work in one of the cubicals:

 

Written above toilet paper, "Kit for making your own Turbin" :yes:

 

"Here I sit broken hearted, tried to sh*t but then I farted, later on I took a chance, done a fart and sh*t my pants" :huh:

 

We also have the toilet tennis one and a shit load of boogers on the back of the door. :S

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Toilet tennis and Art degree's are old.

 

I do like the "Cafeteria is a long way away" one :P

 

Damn you... Mumma mia is stuck in my head now!

 

At work we have many internationals... so we have instructions on how to use a toilet :S

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I f**ked your mum.

Go home dad, you're drunk.

 

 

I didn't actually see that, but heard a comedian say it. I cracked up.

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First guy wrote " I Need more pussy"

Second guy replied "Fu*k fat chicks"

third guy wrote "Fat chicks are like mopeds, fun to ride until your mates find out"

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i always see a shit load of

 

"For gay sex, call #"

Edited by danbevsta

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